“Lord, I believe, but Help my Unbelief”

The Lord has a funny way of working. One month ago, I went home to visit for Labor day. It was strange but familiar being home. I was able to see a lot of people I have been missing. Even though I was home for the weekend, I knew I would have to make the long trip back to Memphis soon enough. I went to the Brookfield Zoo like I normally do to read Scripture. I was praying that the Lord would speak clearly through His word because I have been so desperately needing to hear the Lord’s voice. I was sitting by the Lions exhibit reading Mark 9:14-32. This is the passage where a dad asks Jesus to help his son who is possessed by an evil Spirit.

When the dad asks Jesus he says, “It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.” Then Jesus goes on to say, “”If you can?” said Jesus “Everything is possible for him who believes.””

Something bad has been going on in the dad’s family for a really long time and for him it happened to be a demon who has possessed his son. I haven’t ever been possessed by a demon but I do believe I have been engaging in Spiritual warfare more than ever just in the last year alone. It is really easy to let doubts and unbelief creep in when your life is in constant turmoil.

Then scripture says,  ^“Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!”

This verse stuck out to me more than ever before. I have been stuck in this season of lack of faith. Moving is really hard, especially going to a place that is so different than everything I have known. I have even been doubting my call to ministry. On that bench at the zoo right after I read this, I knew at that I needed to stop and pray. I placed my bible next to me. I started to pray over and over “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!”

As I was praying this a lady sits down on the same bench right next to me. I stop praying and look up. The lady looks over to me and asks me, “Is that God’s Word?” I say, “You betcha it’s God’s word! Do you read God’s Word?” Maybe it was a bold question but if you know me well enough, I’m a bold evangelist. That’s the only way I role.

The two of us sat on the bench talking about God for half an hour. She has had a rough life and needed to talk about hard things. I prayed with her and then she went on her way. I was able to minister to a stranger in the zoo. The Lord was helping me to overcome my unbelief. He reminded me that my life is ministry. It doesn’t just happen in a church or living on the mission field like I am doing in Memphis. I need to give myself more grace when it comes to thinking about my past, present, and future calling. The Lord will be with me wherever I go!

Now I am back in Memphis. I co-lead a high school girls small group on Sunday night and I had some time before it started, so I went to Starbucks to write this blog post. I just typed in the title of this blog post and a lady at the next table asks me, “Are you writing a sermon?” I laughed and told her “No way, I don’t preach.” Then I explained to her I was writing a blog post. She was a legit believer and I knew that within a few minutes of talking to her. We ended up talking for a long time about life and God. She was able to speak truth over my life that I needed in that moment. The Lord has been slowly helping me overcome my unbelief and recent lack of faith. When the transition to Memphis gets hard, I constantly remind myself that God is for me and not against me.

This passage in Mark continues with  “He replied, “This kind can come out only by prayer.” 

We need to be remaining in prayer! Prayer is a way that we communicate with God and he communicates with us. As I was praying on that bench at the zoo the Lord spoke clearly to me. Prayer is so powerful and God shows me his character through prayer. So let us not be afraid of prayer but let’s embrace it. When we pray, we are coming before the Lord’s throne humbling ourselves and admitting we don’t have it all together.

As I go about my time in Memphis I pray  “Lord I believe, but help my unbelief.”

Thank you Jesus for continually reminding me of who you are. Praise the Lord!

Challenge:

• Where over your life do you need to pray, “Lord I believe, but help my unbelief?”
• How is your prayer life?
• Are you looking for opportunity’s to share Christ with others? You never know when the Lord can use you to impact the life of a unbeliever or fellow believer.

 

Pictures from my journey in Memphis!

 

 

Trip to the zoo with a few of my students. We like to have fun!

 

       

The Lady eagles Volleyball team reading with my class! Loved coaching these girls!

 

Birthday Cupcake with the roommate! I can’t believe I’m 27 now!

 

            

I was able to volunteer with my church’s youth ministry to do Bible Club through Street Reach! It was so refreshing to be able to participate in the same exact thing that brought me to Memphis in the first place!